i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
