I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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