Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
should my penis look like a turkey
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
