clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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