wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
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