My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
