my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
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