Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize