There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
