you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
