i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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