Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
