I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
