Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
