You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
