I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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