i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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