So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
