Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
