Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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