that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Randomize
