I must be too annoying 4 u.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
