I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
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