Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
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