OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
