We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
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