Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
