I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
They have beer where we have blood.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Randomize
