why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You have to summon your inner elephant
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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