did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
