ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect