"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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