Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
