Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize