You smell like stripper and shame
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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