I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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