She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
