sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i think i have two assholes
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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