Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize