your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I want to fling myself into the sun
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
