12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
