But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
