What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize