I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
