Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
dude i'm inner monologue high
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
