so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
