garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
i think my cat just said my name.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
