last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
