when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
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Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
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He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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