the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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