i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
